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Sunday, October 20, 2013

Sunday Reflections - Riding the Emotional RollerCoaster and feeling the impact

I feel things.

Deeply.

When I get sad - I'm really sad.
When I'm mad - I'm furious.
When I'm happy - I'm over the moon.

Intense. Yep. Do I cry in pretty much any of these states. Yep. I HATE that about me, especially the mad one. I want to yell when I'm mad but for some reason I cry. On top of being mad at someone it is so frustrating for them to perceive me as weak. Arggghhh! Maybe I need hypnosis or something.

Anyway, this was one of those emotional weeks.  Highs, lows and very little in-between.

I was all over the place.

What was fascinating to me was being able to feel the reaction/impact it was having on my body.

Before this point in my life, any time I was going through a stressful and/or joyful time, I had my underlying digestive problems running parallel so I could never really tell where one problem started and another problem ended. And frankly I wasn't very self-aware.

But this time I could clearly feel my reaction to stress. The underlying digestive part was not a factor. I'm still on the strict phase of the Candida diet and its working. My digestion and related Candida issues are totally at bay.

So this time when I got stressed I could clearly feel what it was doing to my body and it was interesting.

I got a really bad, cramp-y stomach ache. But it would just come and go for about 1/2 hour spurts here and there.  It didn't throw my whole digestive system out of whack. It didn't stay with me 24/7 like I was used to. And when the stress went away (things have been resolved I think) so did the stomach problems.

I didn't sleep well. I could fall asleep at night. But by about 2:30 am I was up and restless. Fitful. Tossing and turning. But not like my previous bouts of insomnia. Those usually started with me being unable to fall asleep at all. Again, as soon as the stress was lifted, I slept through the night. Well, as much as one does with a poorly sleeping one-year old and a 4 year old with a wicked cough.

My right shoulder started to hurt. A deep down ache. Not very many weeks ago I said my shoulder was 95% about 95% of the time. Well, not when I'm stressed. It was pretty incredible how intense and deep of an ache I got in my shoulder - and how quickly it came over me. And how quickly it went away after the stress lifted.

And I felt emotional. I was pretty easily wounded by some not so pleasant words. I felt raw.

What is incredible about this experience is how quickly I bounced back. A true sign that my Candida is at bay, my adrenal fatigue is "cured" and my digestive system is working. Hallelujah!

What's the morale of this story. Stress is toxic. But stress combined with an underlying digestive system can be debilitating.

And BOTH require YOU TO TAKE ACTION. If you have digestive issues, Candida, adrenal fatigue, burn-out, stress, ya-da, ya-da, ya-da..............you are the only person that can make changes so that their impact can be fixed or at least minimized.

Eat clean. Eliminate garbage from your diet and your body. Have willpower to stay away from those things that you know don't work with your body (dairy? gluten? sugar). It is hard but it is worth it. Cleanse. Figure out your food sensitivities. Eliminate them. Experiment. Listen to your body to figure out what it sees as toxic. We are all different and no one can do this for you.

Reduce your stress. Make different choices. Make choices for the right reasons not for the right optics. Say no. Ask for help. Give yourself a break. Slow down. Go to bed early.  Take time for yourself. Breathe. Relax your shoulders (note to self). Let it go.

Smile. You will have lots to smile about if you are taking care of yourself.

I had a crazy stressful week. But because of all the changes I have made in my diet and in my life to reduce stress and take care of myself I sailed through it like I never could have before. And I came out the other end with a smile on my face. I think I'm figuring things out.

At the bank today, the rep I was dealing with told me I looked too young to have 3 kids. I laughed. And when he had to look at my ID and saw that I was 37 he looked surprised and said "it must be because you smile so much".  Thank-you Mr. Banker - for giving me one more reason to smile!







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